1. They don’t have any future financial plans
It’s one thing to not have any investments, but another thing entirely if your partner doesn’t seem to have any long-term savings plans.
Shopping regularly or spending money lavishly, but not having an emergency fund or any long-term savings for larger purchases, like a down payment on a house, is definitely something you don’t want to find out on your honeymoon, or after you move in together.
If money disappears as soon as payday rolls around, this can be an indication that your partner doesn’t know how to properly save money. Living paycheque-to-paycheque should be the first red flag that there are some deeper financial issues at play.
2. Bills are never paid on time
You don’t necessarily have to be living with your partner to pick up on this one. If they always seem to be scrambling when a cell phone or credit card bill comes around, this can be a sign that they’re not on top of their finances.
However, if you are living together, it can be a lot easier to spot when bills aren’t being paid (hopefully before the electricity gets shut off!), and it’s a lot more frustrating. Don’t always accept when your partner insists they’ll “take care of it.” Financial statements should be open and accessible for both you and your significant other to see so that you can make sure they get paid.
3. They’re secretive about debt
Secret debt is a big one when it comes to financial infidelity.
But it's not just knowing whether your partner has debt, it’s also important to know the specific kind of debt your partner owes.
The type of debt your partner has will give you insight as to the type of spender your partner is, providing you with even more information about what to look out for, and spending habits to begin curbing. Is it for necessities, like student loan debt or a car loan? Or, is it for luxuries, like multiple pairs of designer shoes or unaffordable property? Assessing the type of debt your partner has is crucial to determine if you’re both financially compatible.
4. They have too many credit cards
There’s no magic number of how many credit cards you should have, as long as you’re using them responsibly. A huge cause for concern is if your loved one seems to have a credit card for every occasion, yet payments aren’t made by the due date, or they’re constantly cancelling and applying for new ones.
If the debt they owe is credit card debt for overspending, this should indicate to you that they’re financially irresponsible.
5. They can’t stick to budgets
When you bring up budgeting to your partner, it should lead to open communication rather than an argument.
A lack of budgeting skills or not being able to stick to one shows that a person is mismanaged and frivolous. This can lead to big issues when you need to create budgets for more important things, like a wedding or your children’s education.
What can you do about your partner’s bad money habits?
Once you’ve understood what to look out for when assessing your financial compatibility, you must think about a course of action, and no, breaking up doesn’t have to be it.
First things first. It’s critical you sit down and voice your concerns to your partner about their financial habits and how it affects your relationship. Try not to be accusatory, but instead offer them concrete solutions for how they can turn their bad habits around. You can even involve yourself in the solution and commit to creating a new financial plan to stick to together.
Regardless of how you approach the situation, there are a few key things you and your partner should do to regain financial stability:
Saving your money
Before your partner tries to tackle rebuilding their credit score or paying off debts, the first step is to start saving money again.
One of the best ways we recommend getting started is by opening a high-interest savings account (HISA). As your partner is likely just starting out on their savings journey, it’s best to start with an account that has no minimum balance.
Minimizing your debt
There’s no quick fix for getting out of debt responsibly, but there are steps you can take to minimize your current debt and avoid unnecessary interest.
Encourage your partner to apply for a balance transfer credit card. These cards allow you to transfer your high-interest debt to a low-interest credit card, ideally with a low balance transfer rate. This will allow your partner to free up money to help pay off debts and get back on track.
Growing your money
Show your partner that growing your savings doesn’t have to be a chore by implementing budgeting apps into your routine. Using apps is quick and easy, and most people are already comfortable doing this regularly, so it shouldn’t be a big adjustment.
'Til debt do us part
Realizing your partner’s poor money habits can have a serious impact on your future may be scary, but it doesn’t have to mean giving up on your relationship or your financial stability.
It’s extremely important to identify these destructive money habits before they snowball into a larger, more irreversible problem. Financial infidelity is extremely hurtful on more levels than just the disappointment of fiscal irresponsibility.
A healthy relationship goes hand in hand with healthy finances. This is not a topic you can avoid, so it’s best to be open with your partner and show them concrete solutions that will assist them in repairing their financial mishaps.
Sources
1. BMO: Spending a Source of Conflict for a Third of Couples - BMO Survey (Feb 8, 2024)
